Radical Intimacy is the concept that all people desire authentic connections, but occasionally fear the risks required to achieve those connections. Whether you are single and seeking a new understanding of yourself or if you are long term partnered and looking for new exploration, we will challenge your understanding of intimacy and guide you to new forms of expression.

Thursday, April 30, 2009

Trust and icy roads.

A few weeks ago my lover and I were driving to Denver for a weekend of fun to celebrate my birthday. On the way, he changed lanes and the car spun out of control. My impressions of the experience are mental vignettes. Watching him frantically spin the wheel to keep us upright and out of danger as we spun in complete circles and zig zagged across the freeway. Red taillights and white headlights melding together in my vision as I clung to door handle and tried to think helpful thoughts. My phone flying out of my hand as we hit the guardrail and bounced into the middle of the freeway. We were lucky, in all ways, and I was incredibly grateful for his driving skill. There were cars, concrete barriers, and opportunities to roll, all of which he avoided.

Driving home from Glenwood Springs this weekend was our first snow driving experience since the Close Call. Roads restricted, chains recommended, poor visibility, and leaving in the late evening all combined to increase the driving tension. I didn't want to burden T. with the extent of my neurosis, but our tell all policy seems to be unstoppable. So driving through the mountain passes, we talked about the nature of our fear. He was driving more cautiously because of our recent experiences. And I was riding more tensely for the same reason.

The experience was enlightening, for both of us. And beyond just driving. We've had poly experiences that were the equivalent of the icy roads and now we have a handy metaphor for the relationship equivalent of spinning out.

Monday, April 27, 2009

More Sex is Safer Sex!

Browsing through a Nantucket bookstore with my (very Baptist) cousin, I picked this book up and thumbed through it. Just released in hardcover, it was a little beyond my book budget. I don't tend to use library books because they get a little testy if you mark them up and I tend to read with a pencil in hand. (Which also makes me reluctant to lend books out, since you have instant access to my inner world reading through it!)

The title essay is the result of applying economic theory to lower the infection rate of sexually transmitted infections. There is something a little off-kilter about applying cost-benefit analysis to this topic (or my favorite chapter which "proves" that having daughters increases the chances of divorce for parents). But it definitely gets your mind moving in new circles.

If you enjoy the occasional mind jump, this is a great book for short, bite size shots of alterna-thinking.