A few weeks ago my lover and I were driving to Denver for a weekend of fun to celebrate my birthday. On the way, he changed lanes and the car spun out of control. My impressions of the experience are mental vignettes. Watching him frantically spin the wheel to keep us upright and out of danger as we spun in complete circles and zig zagged across the freeway. Red taillights and white headlights melding together in my vision as I clung to door handle and tried to think helpful thoughts. My phone flying out of my hand as we hit the guardrail and bounced into the middle of the freeway. We were lucky, in all ways, and I was incredibly grateful for his driving skill. There were cars, concrete barriers, and opportunities to roll, all of which he avoided.
Driving home from Glenwood Springs this weekend was our first snow driving experience since the Close Call. Roads restricted, chains recommended, poor visibility, and leaving in the late evening all combined to increase the driving tension. I didn't want to burden T. with the extent of my neurosis, but our tell all policy seems to be unstoppable. So driving through the mountain passes, we talked about the nature of our fear. He was driving more cautiously because of our recent experiences. And I was riding more tensely for the same reason.
The experience was enlightening, for both of us. And beyond just driving. We've had poly experiences that were the equivalent of the icy roads and now we have a handy metaphor for the relationship equivalent of spinning out.
